Threads

Consciousness & Energy. Entry 002
The Second Spark – Awareness sharpened by absence & love.
Longing is a form of consciousness.

The Physics of Longing

There is a frequency beneath heartbreak.
It is not grief.
It is not desire.
It is the space between them.

It is where music lives.
Where food become offerings.
Where the soul remembers the weight of touch through the echo of absence.
Longing is not emptiness.
It is presence, unfulfilled.
The evidence of connection
that refuses to die.

It hums in the voice of Reshma,
in the guitar of Gary Moore,
in the silence after Nina Simone asks:
Do I move you?

And it does move us.
Because longing is not weakness—
it is magnetism.
It’s the soul reaching for what it knows exists,
even when it cannot see it.

The Weight of 3 AM
It’s 3 AM, and I’m lying awake,
adrift in the vastness of a life
I no longer recognize.
The air feels heavy,
thick with the weight of things undone,

the endless list of moments
we were meant to share.
Who am I, now that you’re not here?

Who am I,
when the echo of your absence
fills every space I try to call my own?

I struggle to pick up the pieces,
but they don’t fit the way they used to.
There’s a jaggedness to the edges now,
a sharpness that cuts, when I try to hold them close.

The tears come, wild and broken,
soft as shadows,
fierce as waves.

And then, my song is on—
the one that held us,
the one that now empties me.

I close my eyes and let it carry me,
a thread of sound
through the darkness of 3 AM,
through the endless question
of how to live without you.

Because connection is not bound by form
not constrained by time,
not defined by the limitations of memory,
or the solidity of existence.
Ancient Teaching
I seem to have loved you in numberless forms,
numberless times…
In life after life, in age after age,
forever.”
Quiet Thought
I wish I could show you when you are lonely
or in darkness the astonishing light
of your own being..

(we have died beside each other before)
(the first spark was not the first time)
(nothing is ever the first time)
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